Wanting to make that change.

For a while now, i know, i wanna make that change. That leap of not
faith, but something different, because i know, when i make that leap,
i'm not at risk of failing in life as society sees it, not am i in
risk of death.

But making that change, i'm afraid i might lose, my conception of who
i am. Because, i think i'm different, i'm not one of those teenagers
out there who wanna get out of high school, get that pass certificate,
go to college, get another pass certificate, take all these pass
certificates to impress someone, get a fat paycheck, marry a similar
fat paycheck and live their lives. Sorry i'm not that person, or i
don't consider myself to be one.

Because i believe i study, to learn, not to get that pass certificate,
not impress anyone else with my marks, and to get on somewhere on that
leaderboard of toppers. Sorry, i don't. I've been there before, i've
been among the leaderboard many a time in my school life. But i've
changed.

I wanna study to learn something new, i wanna use all what i learn to
someday do good. That's all i wanna do with my life, just do good.

Do good for the world, the universe, the country, the city, the room,
the family anything... I just wanna do good.

But now i need to make that change, society is forcing me, family is
forcing me, to be focussed on my 'one single duty' they say, TO STUDY!

Now how's that my duty? Well being a firm believer, my faith tells me
to obey my father and mother. And they want me to study. So yeah it
is.

I need to keep my head off the so many "unneccessary distractions",
like my passionate following of current affairs, to know what happens
in the business world, follow my passions of technology, design,
football, marketing and all that, and just focus. Leave aside all
relationships, passions, dreams and just focus for the next few
months.

Because these months are important for me to get a pass certificate
from a board no one respects, telling that i've successfully followed
what they've told me to do. I've learn a hell lot, and i haven't made
anything of my own, i just haven't had the opportunity to use it, to
solve a problem, to create something, to do good with it. But yeah...
Without all that and good memory, i can get through many subjects.

I need to get away from distractions, stop listening to ideas, stop
dreaming and focus, because i need to pass.

Because i need to prove them all wrong, that even if i've failed till
the last moment, i can turn this all around.

For whom? To show what? To prove what?

For myself to prove, to show, to reveal, how incredible i am.

I need to win this, turn it all around and have a Bollywood/Hollywood
walk of glory before the credits start rolling for high school.

Pray for me. :)
Love u all
GBY (God Bless You, yeah this 'GBY' is especially for u)